So if this sounds like you, I would ask you to consider a new strategy to achieve your goal. As Einstein said, the definition of Insanity is Doing the same thing over and over, and expecting a different outcome. And as a matchmaker, I think this definitely applies to dating.
An ever popular, and yet so unsuccessful strategy is to head out on New Years Eve with a few single friends, imbibe in the spirit of the night, and hope to ‘bump into that perfect mate’ who has eluded you all these years. If life were a fairy tale, then this would be a great strategy! If you are single, you may ever have tried this once or twice. But the probability in this complex world, that your future soul mate will just happen to be at the same bar at 11:59 pm New Years Eve is unfortunately highly unlikely.
So I would recommend a more structured approach to such an important quest.
One option would be to connect your goal of meeting someone, with another popular goal – getting in shape. There can be magic in this combination. So join a health club, or take up Yoga. You might just meet someone who at least shares your goal of a healthier lifestyle. And even if you don’t, you will be energized, feel better about yourself, and frankly, be a more attractive date.
Increasingly, busy singles are looking to dating services to help increase their probability of finding a good match. And this time of year, the numbers support the popularity of this choice. Many online dating sites report traffic increases of 15-20%.
Online dating sites typically provide an online profile of each member that can help you screen to what you perceive as a promising match. This can help you whittle the ‘thousands in your city’ down to ‘hundreds’. Just keep in mind that these profiles are self-authored, and may somewhat overstate the interests, attributes and activities. And with the large numbers now connecting through these sites, you may end up feeling like you have just signed up for a second job!
So for the truly busy, I would recommend they consider talking to a professional matchmaker. The advantage that this offers is that a real person, who is a specialist in matching couples, will get to know you, and work within their networks to find what they believe may be a great match. This can be a major advantage. Asking a dating expert to get to know you, and suggest matches that they believe could be a great fit for you, changes the game. Your personal ‘filters’ and ‘lists’, which may have led you to completely overlook potentially promising matches in your past, become less of a factor. And you may be surprised how much you enjoy being with a match selected just for you by a dating expert.
Another big plus is that most Professional Matchmakers will do all the logistic work for you, checking both your calendars, selecting a venue, and making the arrangements. So all you have to do is show up and have fun! And the better matchmakers will also follow up to get your thoughts on their latest match, to help guide their future selections.
And here is one interesting tidbit that I have observed over my years as a matchmaker. When I meet happily married couples who have been together at least 7 years, I often ask them if their spouse would have been on their initial ‘shopping list.’ And far more often than not, the answer is no. But when they met, they sensed chemistry and attraction.
So if finding a mate is on your 2013 To Do List, get on it today. But take some advice from both me, and Einstein, and try a different approach.
Remember…Valentines Day is just 6 weeks away!
A professional with an MBA, this curvy lady (30s) enjoys the finer things of life, such as theatre, dancing, travel & wine tasting. Fond of the great outdoors, you can find her camping or hiking Maritime trails. Movies, music & dogs hold a special spot in her heart. She's searching for an educated, professional man in his 40s who loves to travel & hopes to have a family one day.